When the other shoe falls...

The other shoe fell last week.

Hubby had just been commended at work for doing a good job, and even been given a raise.  We thought we were "in the clear" as far as his job goes.

Then he went to work and was laid off. 

Due to the extenuating circumstances, Hubby does not believe this was at all related to his job performance or the possibility he is beginning to have symptoms.  He believes it was just county politics.  But I wonder....if I see symptoms at home - how does it affect his job?  Maybe his short term memory issues and delayed reaction time, and delayed cognition and poor balance and other physical symptoms are causing him to work too slow.  Maybe he only THINKS he is working fast.  Maybe "as fast as he can" has become too slow?  There are so many unknowns.  But Hubby doesn't see this.  Hubby only sees that he is trying as hard as he can, and that his boss wants to hire his buddy and had to can him to do so.  There are many things I do not know...

What I DO know...is that God is good ALL the time.
He really is.
His plan is good and perfect even when we don't know what it is or why things are happening.

So we do not fear.
There is no reason to fear.
What can mere man do to me?
God is FOR us, not against us!

Is it stressful, oh, to be sure!
Is it hurtful? Definitely.

BUT - we have an overwhelming sense of calm and peace and strength that only the Holy Spirit could give us.

I try hard to be both the soft place for Hubby to fall AND the rock to give him strength.  Even tho I know that his TRUE rock needs to be the Lord.

I listened to him at church yesterday, as he simply stated, "it's okay, it must be God's will." 
He also said that most of the guys he worked with are big partyers and drinkers, and "it is really hard to be salt and light in that kind of environment." 
So it will all be for the best in the long run.

We are simply placing our future in HIS hands and praying for His will to be done.
We truly thought we were following His will in taking that job...and it is a bit of a let down that it didn't work out the way we expected.  It makes us doubt whether we heard His voice correctly or not.  But perhaps this was part of the overall plan!  HE knows what HE is doing with our lives much more than we ever could attempt to plan.  And we know HIS all powerful goodness and mercy and love...and therefore we TRUST in HIM!

We will be fine.

I have an overwhelming sense of peace and strength and love...I can just FEEL the Holy Spirit with me - with us. 

Hubby has several prospects - in fact, he had a job offer within a few hours of being laid off (unfortunately, it has no benefits, no time off, and he would have to work every weekend).  He is visiting several places and dropping off resumes.  He hope to wrap it up by the end of this week, but we will accept the Lord's timing in this and in all things.

God will always provide.
in many ways.

Praise Him for His goodness and mercy and love, His grace and strength and power! 
Praise Him from the highest hills, for His name is great and glorious!
Halleluiah!

What I struggle to say

God has sure been speaking to me through the radio today.

First, Casting Crowns came on, with Praise Him in The Storm:

Then Kutless, and Even If

Then more songs, one after the next, about struggling through life and our acceptance of God's will and His great love for us through all things.

These are my true feelings...but I struggle to express them with my own words...

Here are the words I want to say:
Sometimes all we have to hold on to
Is what we know is true of who You are
So when the heartache hits like a hurricane
That could never change who You are
And we trust in who You are
Even if the healing doesn't come
And life falls apart
And dreams are still undone
You are God
You are good
Forever faithful One
Even if the healing
Even if the healing doesn't come

Lord we know your ways are not our ways
So we set our faith in who You are
Even though You reign high above us
You tenderly love us
We know Your heart
And we rest in who You are
You're still the Great and Mighty One
We trust You always
You're working all things for our good
We'll sing your praise
You are God and we will bless You
As the Good and Faithful One
You are God and we will bless You
Even if the healing doesn't come
Even if the healing doesn't come

====================================================
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again,
I say "Amen", and it's still raining
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

[Chorus:] And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You
But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain "I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

[Chorus]
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

[Chorus x2]
=======================================================

Yes, I will praise HIM.
In any storm... even if the healing doesn't come...